Self Reliance

This is a theme on which I have already touched in my posting about Transcendentalism which I encountered through Walt Whitman and Ralph Waldo Emerson. Emerson was distinguished through his Self-Reliance. It is a point that is still uppermost in my mind. Don’t rely on others, because they will let you down. Don’t do something because others do it. Expect nothing from the mass or the crowd. Be critical about churches and the clergy – including me! Cut the bullshit, mean what you say and say what you mean! Travel less, stay away from mass tourism and be yourself in relation to nature and beauty. Those are bold things to say.

This evening, I will not approach Transcendentalism or self-reliance from an academic point of view, but from the experience most of us are living through. We are “locked down” in our homes, confined, in order to stop the transmission of SARS-CoV-2 from areas with more cases than others from person to person. The idea is to prevent hospitals from being overloaded with critical cases. The idea of lockdown is to prevent travel except defined cases like work or buying essential food and medical supplies. It also prevents gathering of people in which any infected (even if non-symptomatic) person would reinfect others.

Laws have to apply to all, and I have become aware of how collectivist our society has become. This will inevitably make people think of Orwell’s Big Brother and the dystopian heritage of Nazism and Soviet Communism. To be frank, I find it absurd that lockdown forbids long solitary walks and hikes, mountaineering, sailing and other such activities, because they do not necessarily involve social gatherings – and therefore risks of propagation of the virus. Here in France, all pleasure boating has been forbidden since mid-March, and only now are professionals like fishermen and boat conveyors being allowed to put to sea. In an ideal world, we would be trusted to use common sense. Unfortunately, some people are still flouting the lockdown rules for frivolous purposes, congregating in parks, and causing the State authorities to take stricter measures. We are all responsible for each other. The point of wearing a mask is to protect other people against us, unless we are using an FFP2 mask, which is hard to find. If the other person is wearing a mask, then we will be protected – at least about 80 to 90%. The pandemic has made us into a single collective society in which our own feelings, opinions, gripes or whatever else have no importance.

Lockdown has brought most of us into self-reliance, but one that does not involve kicking against the pricks, but living with what we have. For example, I need to make something in my workshop – a flatbed for my small boat trailer to take some stuff to the dump. I don’t have the materials I need, at least not ideal ones, so I have to become inventive. I can’t go to the timber yard or the DIY shop, because they are closed until 11th May, the date presently chosen by the Macron government to begin the deconfinement process. So, I rummaged through my workshop and found bits of old wood to “jury-rig” a trailer flatbed. I’ll be starting work tomorrow, and then, as the rubbish dumps re-open, I’ll be able to get rid of the eyesore of stuff to get rid of.

I am very lucky to be living in a house in the country with an outside garden and yard. I have plenty to do even though I have no translation work at present. Lockdown is a hard thing to live through psychologically, because the anxiety is always there about the virus itself and the effect on the economy. I fear that my wife is cracking at the seams, and there is little I can do about it. Being an “Aspergers” autistic person has been a great advantage for me, because I am much less reliant on social support and contact. Spending a lot of time alone at home is quite normal for me. I also had the experience of being a working guest with a monastic community, following the monastic way of life and spirituality. That for me was very hard, but I had time out each week for a long excursion in the Vercors hills and the little villages. Even all that did not prepare me for something that may turn out to be a “Spanish Flu” of our own times, exactly a hundred years after the post World War I tragedy involving millions of deaths.

They are (normally) letting us out on the 11th May. I might be allowed to go sailing!!! Maybe I’ll have to wait a little longer, because it will all be in stages. They have to stop mass travelling and tourism, and they can’t allow gatherings for sports, concerts, etc. until they are sure there will be no second wave. The assumption is always the same, that we all want to crowd up and socialise with large numbers of people. Few of us are content to be alone even when we are out of the house!

I returned to Emerson’s essay and his mention of travelling. In his day, travelling was reserved to the rich. Now, it is crowds, large numbers of people all wanting to do the same thing at the same time. I last travelled by aeroplane in 2013 when my mother died and we needed to be in England quickly. Prior to that, I made four trips to the USA and experienced the post 9/11 security procedures in the airports. Now what I have noticed about the current pandemic is that much of the propagation is the direct result of mass tourism by planes and cruise ships. The virus moves because people move. My wife and I visited the Mont Saint Michel last January, when there were few tourists – because in the high season it is jam-packed and most unpleasant. Even in January, it is plain that the place is made for mass tourism. Is tourism worth it? This may be a lesson we all learn from being impeded from travelling: having to have an attestation paper just to buy food and get stuff from the chemist’s. The borders are closed in Europe. I would not be allowed to go to England even if I wanted to at this time. I can take my wife to work because she has no driving licence, because she has to work, and I have a legitimate excuse of helping a family member. Our life is certainly crimped, but we live with it. I have no desire to return to crowded cities, queues, jostling, the wasps’ nest colony, etc. How Emerson could have imagined where tourism might go, it is very thought-provoking.

I think it would be good for there to be a drastic reduction of the number of flights for the sake of the environment. Over the European Continent or the USA, long distances can be travelled by high speed train for those who have to travel for reasons of work or culture. Just for going on holiday, some of us are content to stay nearer our homes and enjoy some self-reliance by camping, boating or whatever. I hate hotels, large campsites with “bottled” entertainment, noise, oof-ta oof-ta bang-bang and anything designed for the inevitable collectivist paradigm. If we were less collectivist, we would be healthier and would bring less diseases from parts of the world where exotic animals are eaten or where security in microbiological laboratories is lax. Who wants to go to China, any more than North Korea? There are places to keep well away from. We don’t have to go there to learn about comparative culture!

There will come a time when we become dependent on others, because we get old or sick. That will be a time for spiritual freedom like what we are going through now. Even those of us who have not caught the virus are part of a sick society. Society as a whole is in quarantine and being examined and tested by medical and scientific experts. We have no more freedom than a hospital patient waiting to be discharged. Again, this theme of collectivism comes through.

Each time I read Oscar Wilde’s De Profundis, it is like beholding a diamond several times and seeing a different facet each time. I read this:

It is tragic how few people ever ‘possess their souls’ before they die. ‘Nothing is more rare in any man,’ says Emerson, ‘than an act of his own.’ It is quite true. Most people are other people. Their thoughts are some one else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation. Christ was not merely the supreme individualist, but he was the first individualist in history. People have tried to make him out an ordinary philanthropist, or ranked him as an altruist with the scientific and sentimental. But he was really neither one nor the other. Pity he has, of course, for the poor, for those who are shut up in prisons, for the lowly, for the wretched; but he has far more pity for the rich, for the hard hedonists, for those who waste their freedom in becoming slaves to things, for those who wear soft raiment and live in kings’ houses. Riches and pleasure seemed to him to be really greater tragedies than poverty or sorrow. And as for altruism, who knew better than he that it is vocation not volition that determines us, and that one cannot gather grapes of thorns or figs from thistles?

Indeed what about altruism in a world where others do not care about us. We do good for others because love is better than hate. However, Wilde said:

But while Christ did not say to men, ‘Live for others,’ he pointed out that there was no difference at all between the lives of others and one’s own life. By this means he gave to man an extended, a Titan personality. Since his coming the history of each separate individual is, or can be made, the history of the world. Of course, culture has intensified the personality of man. Art has made us myriad-minded. Those who have the artistic temperament go into exile with Dante and learn how salt is the bread of others, and how steep their stairs; they catch for a moment the serenity and calm of Goethe, and yet know but too well that Baudelaire cried to God — “O Seigneur, donnez moi le force et le courage De contempler mon corps et mon cœur sans dégoût”.

Our unity with God and all of human nature is our essential unity or non-duality which we have to learn. More recent philosophy makes a clearer distinction between the person and the individual. We are not merely individual units of a same nature, but persons in communion and solidarity. We have to accept that one’s man’s treasure is another’s rubbish.

It is certainly by being our personalities that we can be ourselves without being selfish and sinful through refusing the other person his or her rights and dignity. Self-reliance, far from being sinful individualism, solipsism and selfishness, is not expecting from others what they cannot give. Some have more gifts than we have, and others have much less. Our strength as persons can only come from self-knowledge and spiritual health.

As I expressed in my little talk yesterday about Sectarian Religion and the Abdication of Reason, I would like to learn more about the concept of Non-Duality as expressed par excellence by the Hindu tradition, but also by our own western Christian mystics. We are dogged by our alienation and the sentiment of Jean-Paul Sartre when he came up with the astounding idea – L’enfer c’est les autres.

Sartre expresses the idea of shame as the original feeling of the other person’s existence. I see myself as the other sees me, as an object. It is similar to that exclamation of Baudelaire quoted by Wilde – Grant me the strength, O Lord, to contemplate my body and my heart without disgust. Our shame is our self-esteem in relation to others. Being examined and looked at by others makes me what I am not. There regard exposes me, makes me fragile and an object. They are my hell. We have to escape and become ourselves again. Sartre saw relationships in terms of conflict and alienation. The play Huis clos illustrates alienation by the other and who closes me into a given nature, which deprives me of freedom. French existentialism is hard to understand and follow, but how many times we have felt like that!

Self-reliance does not prevent us from being benevolent and making friends among specially compatible personalities. We may be able to experience close communion with some. Others will remain a mystery of otherness and alienation.

We still have another couple of weeks of lockdown, and then the “social distancing” has to continue through “barrier gestures” like keeping a certain distance and wearing masks – all to avoid transmitting or catching the feared virus. Perhaps this will help some to rely more on themselves than to depend on the unreliable characteristics of fickle human nature. Some of us will become cynical (modern meaning) and divide people up into hylics, psychics and pneumatics – denying that any might cross the boundaries. The problem is that many people fit into these categories. Do we as Christians say that we do not care? On the other hand, do we throw pearls to swine?

For the time being, we are at home, comfortable or bitter as the case may be. We will again face the world of trying to earn a living by work and dealing with our shame as we wear our masks and keep the proper distances from those we have to consider as potential sources of infection. In this way, other people become our hell. I have confidence that prayer and meditation will help us in our Way of the Heart, to acquire compassion and empathy. Perhaps a new society and humanity will come out of it all. I have my doubts but I also have faith…

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Sectarian Religion and the Abdication of Reason

Some reflections on irrational religion, “red herrings” and diseases of the mind. I discuss some aspects of the “ecclesiastical freak show” that attracts curiosity, and how this curiosity needs to give way to critical reasoning and creative imagination. I touch upon the idea of Non-Duality which is uppermost in the Hindu spiritual traditions but also in the Gospels and Christian mysticism. We need to learn from each other.

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Low Sunday 2020 Mass and Sermon

I have just uploaded my Mass for Low Sunday. I used the “weekday” Sunday Mass rather than the series of repeats of Easter Sunday at odds with the clausa paschuae on Easter Saturday in the Gregorian and Gelasian Sacramentaries.

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Informal talk on the Use of Sarum

Here is an informal talk on my book A Twitch on the Sarum Thread with greater insistence on the founding cultural and philosophical principles underlying liturgical traditions. Indeed it is not specifically about the Sarum Use / Rite but the diversity of local traditions and Christian culture. To get an understanding of things, we need to go to fundamental principles before considering the details.

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An Easter Day Ramble

I have put this little talk on my Romantic Christianity book. I finish with IX of the Spiritual Songs by Novalis on the Resurrection – in German and then in George McDonald’s beautiful English translation.

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Happy Easter

I would like to send my Easter greetings to my Bishop, my fellow clergy, the faithful of our Church and all men and women of good will.

This is an extract from the oratorio Christus by Franz Liszt. I was always struck by the way this chant of O Filii et Filiae emerges from the sadness and gloom of Good Friday, bringing us ever more into the light of the Resurrection. The former things pass away as do the grief and pain.

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Paschal Vigil 2020

Holy Saturday 2020 following the Use of Sarum. This is not an easy ceremony to do alone! The essential is to “sow the seeds”… The ceremony is simplified but contains the blessing of the fire and incense grains to attach to the Paschal Candle, the singing of Inventor rutili and the Exultet, the Prophecies, the two Litanies and Mass.

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A Reflection on Louis-Claude de Saint Martin

From Louis-Claude de Saint Martin’s L’Homme de Désir, Chant 177:

Qui frappe à la porte sainte ? Un homme de paix, un homme de désir. Cet homme de paix, cet homme de désir, a-t-il vaincu ses ennemis ? Who is knocking at the holy door? A man of peace, a man of desire. Has this man of peace or man of desire beaten his enemies?

* * *

On this Good Friday, we are in the midst of the most ferocious battle of history – life and death, light and darkness. Who is our enemy? Our greatest enemies of the powers of the darkness of this world. These are spiritual enemies, not only demons or archons, but those who rule this world. The enemy is also within each of us.

I have mentioned the comparison I have made between viruses and evil spirits. Viruses are bits of DNA and bio-chemicals associated with life. The conventional opinion of viruses are that they have no life or consciousness of their own but are parasites in the meaning of their living from the life of another being. I am not a virologist and have no qualifications in micro-biology, but I have read notions. I continue to discover what I can. Evil has no life or consciousness, but saps light and consciousness. There are empty human persons without any real life in them, and they are “vampires”, not biting people on the neck and drinking blood but draining spiritual energy. Evil spirits govern us by fear and impede us from approaching spiritual knowledge and the way of God’s Kingdom. Their goal is to make us materialists and “men of the torrent”.

We have all noticed that those who seek the truth, the mystics and the wise are put aside and sabotaged. On this Good Friday and the two preceding weeks of the liturgy, we see the efforts of the leaders of this world to extinguish the light. Perhaps one who most understood this was Oscar Wilde as he languished in prison:

Philistinism was the note of the age and community in which he lived. In their heavy inaccessibility to ideas, their dull respectability, their tedious orthodoxy, their worship of vulgar success, their entire preoccupation with the gross materialistic side of life, and their ridiculous estimate of themselves and their importance, the Jews of Jerusalem in Christ’s day were the exact counterpart of the British Philistine of our own. Christ mocked at the ‘whited sepulchre’ of respectability, and fixed that phrase for ever. He treated worldly success as a thing absolutely to be despised. He saw nothing in it at all. He looked on wealth as an encumbrance to a man. He would not hear of life being sacrificed to any system of thought or morals. He pointed out that forms and ceremonies were made for man, not man for forms and ceremonies. He took sabbatarianism as a type of the things that should be set at nought. The cold philanthropies, the ostentatious public charities, the tedious formalisms so dear to the middle-class mind, he exposed with utter and relentless scorn. To us, what is termed orthodoxy is merely a facile unintelligent acquiescence; but to them, and in their hands, it was a terrible and paralysing tyranny. Christ swept it aside. He showed that the spirit alone was of value. He took a keen pleasure in pointing out to them that though they were always reading the law and the prophets, they had not really the smallest idea of what either of them meant. In opposition to their tithing of each separate day into the fixed routine of prescribed duties, as they tithe mint and rue, he preached the enormous importance of living completely for the moment.

As great men have been persecuted in the past, we see the way the medical and political establishment treats Dr. Raoult in Marseille who has found a partial solution for the sick, at least until something better is formulated. For the establishment, the self-importance of pompous men outweighs the welfare and hope of the sick, real people who are not scientific specimens. The forces of this world seek to drag us into the same level of ignorance and darkness.

These beings are projections of the collective unconscious which is deeply attached to static ways of being because it is terrified of change. Our deep fear of change ultimately focuses on our fear of waking up, because deep down we know that accepting change means accepting the death of everything we know. When we are confronted with light and truth, we are instantly filled with fear and the desire to return to ignorance again because of our “safety”.

How do we take up this challenge in order to get back on track? Facing the archons within us and without us can feel like a constant battle. These forces that want to put us to sleep may present themselves as people who have no interest in supporting us, who want to betray us, to belittle us. We are afflicted by an “emotional emptiness” within ourselves, something that resembles pain and prevents us from finding our fullness. How many times do we oppose a natural and genuine person and feel threatened by them? We feel the need to destroy them or criticize them in some way. We take our anger out on everything that frustrates us, living in overcrowded cities, traffic jams, waiting in a queue, machines that don’t work – and it reinforces our eternal restlessness. We really are men of the torrent.

Our struggle is within ourselves. How can we prevent these forces that want to send us to sleep from dragging us into the darkness of the unconscious? This is especially something we can exercise during our confinement, itself a source of frustration.

A thought occurred to me. We should do what we can do and not be frustrated that we cannot do what we are not allowed to do right now. We have to accept what has happened, and what will change. The responsibility is ours and we must not think that entities like the State care about us. They couldn’t care less? Why should they? It is in the darkness that we will find the Light. Our desire (Sehnsucht) for God’s truth will guide us to consciousness and awareness.

The enemy is thus already defeated, and we can approach the gate of the Kingdom of God. This is the deepest meaning of Easter.

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Good Friday 2020

Mass of the Presanctified, Vespers and Burial of the Lord according to the Use of Sarum. Village parish version. The two Old Testament lessons and the Passion of St John are in English, the rest in Latin (Greek in the Trisagion).

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Maundy Thursday 2020

Maundy Thursday Mass In Coena Domini according to the Use of Sarum, village church version. Mass is celebrated and three hosts are consecrated. The Preface is taken from the Rouen Missal. Vespers are sung at the lectern and the altars are stripped and washed. Please note that in the Use of Sarum, there is no Altar of Repose on Maundy Thursday. After the Mass of the Presanctified of Good Friday, the third host is “buried” in the Easter Sepulchre with the wooden crucifix. Please see my Bishop’s Chrism Mass.

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